I don't want to end this.

That trip to Pangkor, was so nice.....
The trip.... the best time I had ever had since I've 'awakened'.
Awakened... from the dream ,
A life that I thought I lived..... only to wake up into a hard,
dead world that my sensitive self could not....
....take in.

That world, started when I was 12.
My best friend stopped talking to me,
Just to get ready for the wretched test.

I founded 'new' best friends that year,
and tried my best to be all cheery,
But I stopped talking to anyone else.

My homework was a mess,
yet I have no will to start nor finish them.
I feel unwell just to touch them.
I hate being told what to do.

Then there comes secondary school.
Me and my best friend were forced to part
I thought that I could start a new school life,
yet I kept retreating back to my 'old self'.
Not willing to change, much.

My memmory was all messed up.
Trying to forget --everything,
forgetting all that I hated,
until nothing could be remmembered.

I tried to talk to a few people,
but just that little.
Even so,
My life changed for the better.......


----to be continued